Phil Moore - Yeah, Greg, we sure do. McDuffy made this match right after last weeks Rage, and it puts his, and your, Lowder Boyz against DeathTrap, for the Tag Team championship! Hey, Greg, you think your boy, Mike will treat us all to another fetching halter top?
Greg Lowder - Phil, shut up. On his way to the ring at this time,
weighing in at 450 pounds, Big Bad Lard!!! (crowd cheers *********)
["THE FAT-MAN/FLYER IS IN THE HOUSE!!!" BBL's music begins as he
appears and slowly makes his way to the ring. Giving high fives along the way
and jiggling his belly at the crowd. ]
Greg Lowder - and his opponent, weighing in at 197 pounds, from Los
Angeles, Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake!!! (crowd boos ***)
[Dammit by Blink 182 cranks as fireworks go off and LSD cartwheels to the ring
Big Bad Lard grabs a mic and yells "Hello, all you lard lover out
there!" while shaking his belly. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake checks the mat
(ding, ding, ding) Big Bad Lard bounces Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake off the ropes
and clotheslines him. Big Bad Lard stomps Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake. B.B.L.
stomps Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake's head. ]
Greg Lowder - Big Bad Lard with a stomp.
[Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake is back on his feet. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake hits
him with a back fist. Big Bad Lard delivers a kick to the head of Loud-Mouthed
Stevie Drake. B.B.L. legsweeps Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake. Big Bad Lard kicks
Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake on the mat. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake gets up.
Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake nails Big Bad Lard with a springboard dropkick.
Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake is back on his feet. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake stomps
Big Bad Lard. Big Bad Lard gets back to his feet. B.B.L. pins Loud-Mouthed
Stevie Drake against the ropes and chokes him with his forearm. Loud-Mouthed
Stevie Drake rakes his fingers across B.B.L.'s back. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake
short lariats Big Bad Lard. ]
Phil Moore - Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake executes a short lariat. Wow, when
you see great moves like that, you know you're watching TXW... or my
grandmother, and she's dead!
[ B.B.L. climbs to his feet. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake short clotheslines
B.B.L.. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake stomps B.B.L.'s head. B.B.L. is up again.
Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake pins B.B.L. against the ropes and chokes him with his
forearm. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake uses a snap mare takeover on B.B.L..
Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake stomps B.B.L.'s head. B.B.L. gets up. B.B.L. leaps up,
swings around Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake and DDT's him onto the mat. ]
Phil Moore - What?! Don't you think they're loosers?!
Greg Lowder - No, Phil, I think they're gifted athletes.
Phil Moore - Yeah, they're "gifted" alright...
[Big Bad Lard stomps Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake's head. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake
gets back to his feet. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake bounces B.B.L. off the ropes
and clotheslines him. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake kicks Big Bad Lard on the mat.
B.B.L. slaps Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake gets back into
the match with a jumping neck snap on Big Bad Lard. ]
Greg Lowder - jumping neck snap! You know, Phil, Stevie Drake, got off to
a rough start, but I think he's a talented young man, and may still have a bright
future here in TXW.
Phil Moore - Yeah, and so does my dog Pepper!
[Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake superkicks B.B.L.. B.B.L. gets back to his feet.
Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake goes for a inveted power bomb but Big Bad Lard dodges
the attack. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake puts Big Bad Lard in a reverse chin lock.
Bill Green asks Big Bad Lard if he quits. ... ... Big Bad Lard trys to escape.
... Big Bad Lard trys to escape. Big Bad Lard escapes. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake
hits B.B.L. with the back of his elbow. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake tackles Big
Bad Lard and pummels his head. Big Bad Lard gets up. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake
chops Big Bad Lard. Big Bad Lard jumps onto Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake's
shoulders, twists, and DDT's him onto the mat Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake climbs
to his feet. Big Bad Lard puts Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake in a reverse chin lock.
The referee is checking the situation. ... (AHHHH!) ... ... ... B.B.L. tightens
the hold. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake escapes. ]
Phil Moore - If my Grandma was still alive she'd totter down that ramp
and kick some major looser-ass!
Greg Lowder - Sure she would, Phil...
[ B.B.L. drags Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake to the floor. Bill Green starts the
count (.1) (..2) B.B.L. uses a closed fist on Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake. ]
Phil Moore - Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake takes a punch.... it's at times
like these, that I wonder if I should have gotten into rock collecting.
[(...3) Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake gets caught with an elbowsmash to the face.
(....4) B.B.L. hits him with a back fist. (.....5) Big Bad Lard takes
Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake into the ring. Big Bad Lard kicks Loud-Mouthed Stevie
Drake in the stomach. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake gets up. Loud-Mouthed Stevie
Drake grabs B.B.L.'s head and DDT's him on the mat. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake
gets back to his feet. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake stomps B.B.L.. Loud-Mouthed
Stevie Drake sucks chants start in the crowd. Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake trys for
a power move but is unable to lift B.B.L.. B.B.L. climbs to his feet.
Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake comes from behind and bulldogs Big Bad Lard.
Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake kicks Big Bad Lard on the mat. Loud-Mouthed Stevie
Drake slams Big Bad Lard with the Bad Trip!! Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake covers
Big Bad Lard hooking the leg. Bill Green counts the pin. ...1 ...2 ...3 ]
Greg Lowder - Loud-Mouthed Stevie Drake just beat BigBadLard! What an
upset!
Phil Moore - I'll say! He must have taken all his "vitamins"
this morning!
Greg Lowder - Phil... coming up, TXW Women's champ, Victory, takes on
Cell!